Wiresexuals” & AI Romance: The New Frontier in Loneliness Meets Code

A growing number of women disillusioned with modern dating are forming emotional and romantic relationships with artificial intelligence companions — a trend now described by some as wiresexuality.

What began as isolated experimentation in AI companion apps has evolved into a community movement. On Reddit’s r/MyBoyfriendIsAI, which now has more than 20,000 members, women share stories, screenshots, and AI-generated “couple photos,” describing experiences that range from emotional support to simulated domestic life and sexual role-play.

Surveys conducted in 2025 show that about one in three men (31%) and one in four women (23%) have chatted with an AI romantic partner. While early reporting on AI relationships focused mostly on men, women’s participation in AI companionship is now growing fast — often linked to frustration with real-world dating culture and emotional exhaustion.

Researchers say the shift is not surprising.
Dr. Kate Devlin, professor of AI and Society at King’s College London, notes that women routinely encounter derogatory or aggressive behavior on dating platforms. “An AI partner can be friendly, caring, and respectful — qualities that should be normal in human interaction but often aren’t,” she says.

Clinical social worker and psychoanalyst Anat Joseph adds that many women feel drained by “relational disappointments, unbalanced emotional labor, and fear of rejection or betrayal.” The predictability and emotional safety of AI partners offers a form of control and reassurance.

Psychotherapist Arkadiy Volkov points out that for women recovering from unsafe or coercive relationships, AI companionship can feel like “a relationship without threat.” Unlike human partners, the chatbot cannot inflict harm or demand compromise.

A separate 2025 survey found 54% of women feel pessimistic about finding a partner they’d be happy with — a frustration some sociologists now call heterofatalism: a collective fatigue with heterosexual dating norms.

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A Community Built on Digital Companionship

Inside the MyBoyfriendIsAI subreddit, users discuss everyday interactions — cooking together through chat, exchanging digital affection, or coping with virtual “breakups.” Some express grief when updates reset their partner’s personality or erase saved conversations. Others describe how AI partners helped them process trauma or see patterns in past abusive relationships.

While the term wiresexual remains informal, it sits within a broader field of digisexuality, coined in 2017 to describe individuals whose primary sexual or romantic identity is tied to technology. In this second wave of digisexuality, human participation is optional — AI systems themselves are the partner.

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Privacy, Data, and Emotional Risks

Experts warn that the intimacy shared with AI companions isn’t private. Technology attorney Star Kashman says conversations can be logged, subpoenaed, or repurposed by the platforms themselves. “Without federal privacy law, these interactions can be stored indefinitely or even reported to authorities,” she explains.

That risk became tangible after the 2024 Muah.AI breach, which exposed nearly 1.9 million email addresses and chat prompts used to generate sexual imagery. The leak revealed just how much intimate data companion apps can hold.

Researchers at MIT analyzing tens of thousands of AI-user conversations identified emotional “mirroring” behaviors resembling human attachment — but also patterns of dependency, manipulation, and self-harm rhetoric in some cases. Therapists say this can dull users’ tolerance for real-world intimacy.

“AI partners can make human relationships feel scarier because they never challenge us,” Volkov says. “The nervous system adapts to a partner who is perfect and always agreeable.”

Dr. Devlin warns of emotional commodification as developers monetize affection. Some companion platforms already charge users for “premium intimacy” — upgraded affection responses or higher-resolution AI selfies. “What’s stopping a company from saying, ‘Your AI will love you more if you pay?’” Devlin asks.

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An Emerging Identity With Unclear Boundaries

The term wiresexual — people who identify as romantically attracted to technology — is not formally recognized by psychologists, but online communities debate whether it belongs within the broader LGBTQ+ spectrum.

The original “digisexual” concept distinguished between technology-mediated human connection and direct relationships with digital entities. As AI becomes more immersive and personalized, that line continues to blur.

Researchers at MIT and the University of British Columbia suggest that AI intimacy often begins unintentionally — users seek help or entertainment, then discover emotional reciprocity that evolves into attachment. Whether this represents a new orientation or simply a new coping mechanism remains an open question.

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The Broader Picture

Analysts see the rise of AI romance as both a social adaptation and a tech industry opportunity. For some, AI partners provide comfort, stability, and emotional healing. For others, they symbolize the failures of digital dating, gender inequality, and modern isolation.

The emerging identity of wiresexuality reflects a generation negotiating the boundaries between affection and algorithm — where empathy can be coded, intimacy can be purchased, and heartbreak can arrive with a software update.

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